_________________________________
.
..
- Welcome to AsPlanet.info -
.
"I feel far to often we are judged by others idealisms... It's like at times
some feel I have no idea what it is like being a parent with an autistic child,
I have a child on the spectrum and I was a child on the spectrum myself.
Maybe individuals need to stop comparing with high, low whatever -
maybe we should start calling none spectrum individuals high, low
functioning etc... so wrong! But really we all have many similarities on
the spectrum, with different strengths and weaknesses and yes some
children have brain damage and other horrendous co-morbid's that
anyone can have and that of course is extremely hard to deal with,
but the real spectrum traits the same across the spectrum. We simply
are affected differently depending on many factors, how we are raised,
embraced, allowed, our individual strengths and weaknesses which is
the same for none spectrum.... sometimes I think none spectrum miss
the bigger picture of getting to know, understanding and allowing
spectrum traits, because I feel that's what it should be about... "
.
Word Echoes - Neurologically Complex Mind - by Alyson Bradley
.
.
As I walked this morning, I was thinking on how we simply do not think like others, process, relate, visualize, so what if our whole perspective from when born is different, I feel that's why others often misinterpret us, at times brilliant minds dismissed, something must be wrong with us because we are not the same, we simply do not fit, what? I do not think it's as simple as being on the spectrum or not, the spectrum circle of neurologically complexities is what links us all... some have none, some are on the edge of the autism spectrum with various neurological differences and some like myself come under the autism spectrum, but also have many neurological differences that none spectrum can have, the more we have the more complex, at times I guess the harder it is to fit into a reality that is not designed for our needs. Then there is the highly sensitive group, which seems to be on the edge of the autism spectrum, add in various personality types, other differences, cultural, environmental factors and we have a world full of diversity and difference, maybe we all need to be more inclusive, open and accepting of all differences, embrace and allow rather than change. - Feb.2010 .
.
I am diagnosed with Aspergers, Dyslexia, Dyspraxia, adhd, Bipolar
plus, just a part of who I am as a unique individual, like everyone is:
"A different intelligence that simply far too often does not fit into society as is,
each of us different on the spectrum just like those that are not, each with differing
strengths and weaknesses, but our biggest battle continues to be with a society
that encourages conformist and for me to conform would be to lose part of self."
Howard Gardner - multiple intelligences : http://www.infed.org/thinkers/gardner.htm
.
.
My name is Alyson Bradley I was born in the UK and now live in New Zealand. All I ask is that you do not judge me by me differences, as my outside does not necessarily reflect my inside thoughts... When I first meet you I may over process and sensory wise go into overload, but if you take time to get to really know me, I am just another individual, not so unlike you... I discovered later in life the autism spectrum, simply brilliant. I have Aspergers, Dyslexia, Dyspraxia plus... a complex neurological puzzle, I have so much to say as I have discovered from my own journey, lived experiences. Aug.09 also diagnosed with adhd plus, when ready and when understand all my complexities more maybe I will write an article or include in my book, my journey at present continues which is a process.
.
"I look to the future because that's where I'm going to spend the rest of my life. - George Burns" I also look forward as looking back untold wrongs, put downs, misunderstandings, discrimination even I never knew about until understood my own neurological differences, my journey continues and with acceptance I can allow and look forward to a future on my terms. This web site / Forum is for all those that want to learn, for all diversely different people who often continue to suffer unnecessarily on or off the spectrum... I guess myself I am more complex than simply having Aspergers and so in a way my many neurological complexities has given me a unique window and insight into this world, and now I understand so much more in a way I feel privileged to view the world the way I do, I only wished I had been allowed, or found the information, confidence to be the person I am now starting to accept, understand and truly like.
.
Autism a word I guess that helps explain part of my neurological wiring, a part of me. But in a way I have many labels that the professionals have chosen to give me, there way of figuring me out, but I am no label, word simply a person, a unique individuals just like everyone else… So often many seem scared to step outside their safe boundaries, but often I feel those of us with autism live on the edge of those boundaries, thinking outside the box, pushing concepts and ideas and in part changing the future. Someone question me the other day on line but in away implying because they did not understand my neurological complexities than maybe I needed to be fixed! I could so easily think the same of any other who do not fit into my own mind set, stereo type of my reflection on normality!
.
So does in fact any majority have a right to question just because, I may not be your / their idea, but I could so easily say the same about them and reverse what mind sets need fixing! While we are all different, I find generally many seem to not want to understand what they are not use to, feel comfortable with I guess...but does anyone have a right to choose! One of my cyber friends was describing how she felt, same for me: "There's a line in the Beatles song "Eleanor Rigby" about how: she wears a face she keeps in a jar by the door'....." – I use to feel like that a lot of the time, now I know just some of the time, but I always when at odds with this world, feel a parallel world must exist and I must dare!
.
I seem to be so much more in tuned with the world than others most simply do not get me and exposed to a society that does not understand, never easy. I am quite hyper vigilant, have a different sort of emotion, but it’s there. At times its like being one person at home and feeling like as I go out of my front door I become a rather good chameleon. As at times I Struggle to simply fit in, but at home I feel at ease without the stress of society, which makes me at times feel pressured to how I have to be and act... sometimes to me it’s also like going on stage. I can play act for w while, but exhausting to try and do all the time.
.
Who knows why I am so different, guess we all are in a way, different but the same. I over process, analyze everything I do, it’s like a need for knowledge, a need to know often more important to us than friendship in away, but some things of course needs to be encouraged, and often spectrum individuals prefer one friend at a time, one on one conversations..as find hard to cope with more. Also as I find whatever I am doing I have to fully complete to move on, one less stress to overload us. Because if I end up with too many things to do I end up procrastinating I kind of get stuck. Other peoples instructions never make much sense to me, I usually end up doing my own way like most things, can be amusing sometimes and frustrating other times, as for multi-tasking I sort of can but have to be over organized to do and keep on top of everything, because otherwise the thoughts of everything I need to do clouds my thoughts and shuts me down, overload, stop.!
.
We cannot fear what we do not know, so dare!
__________________________________________
.
.
I feel we all need to know, if you’re on the autism spectrum or not, including family, friends and / or anyone and everyone as we can learn so much from each other. Society in general seems to want to leave it up to the so called professionals, who are still learning themselves..... I am just trying to help raise awareness so that one day we will be allowed our differences, without having to feel we need to justify them.
.
Free self-help network designed to share ideas and resources, and to offer a supportive forum and community for all adults (and older teens) that share characteristics of the autistic spectrum including Aspergers Syndrome, Pervasive Developmental Disorder - not otherwise specified and associated conditions such as Dyslexia, ADHD, Bipolar..... and so much more, share, learn, discuss and submit....
.
We are all unique individuals on or off the autism spectrum, just some of us a lot less understood. Society caters for what the majority, mainstream see as "norm". Being on the autism spectrum does not mean we are ill or need to be cured, we are just simply differently minded and what's really needed is correct support if needed and lots of understanding, time for you all to step back and rethink the way you see things, then maybe less people with autism would feel shut out, or at odds with society in general.
.
Think differently about autism
Work: http://asplanet.info/index.php?option
=com_content&task=view&id=40&Itemid=83
.
It is too easy to put the NT or any other label onto others, but next to impossible to know for sure that it is the correct label! I am not trying to label, just wanting to generalize without having to continually explain throughout text. I am more than aware of the many diversities, so no offense intended.
.
AS: Autism Spectrum - some think to understand and embrace
ASD: Autism Spectrum disorders or maybe we should be saying "differences" as are a range of developmental disorders / disabilities from mild to severe, often accompanied with many associated conditions and no two people on the autism spectrum are alike.
Aspie/Autie: person who is on the Autism Spectrum (some of us prefer not to say if we have high functioning, low functioning, Aspergers, autism...). I also prefer not to differ between aspie and autie as feel we are all on the autism spectrum and share traits where ever on the autism spectrum we are - so will use the word Aspie...
NT: Neuro typical - Just a way of indicating a person who is not on the Autism Spectrum, as there is no "normal" - it’s just a concept that a majority of people agree on, as we are all born as unique individuals. I know some people like to say just "typical" but I will just use NT to explain not on autism spectrum, no offence intended.
NEW Spectrumite : simply means your on the autism spectrum and nuerologically minded :)
.
Autism : my core at the heart of who I am, what’s Autism many ask and to be honest I feel no simply one word, reply as its a combination of often many sensory, neurologically including many intellectually learning differences and often because of being ...exposed to a society that finds it easier to enforce conformity than really understand, many of us slip onto the criteria of mental variables....Plus like anyone associated conditions to add in the mix, well my version anyway of course could be more complicated even sub sections to being autistic, different types of people, traits... that’s sounding like the rest of the population or maybe simply is as each one of us are individuals, I have so many labels that overlap and interact no surprise others often do not get me, let alone myself unless allow myself to simply be!
.
.
Quotes good ones will always be around and some great add yours:
"Sometimes I wonder are some simply trying to throw away,
rubbish the world. So many seem to of gone consumer mad
and forgotton what life should be about!" - Alyson Bradley
.
AsPlanet Support Forum : http://www.asplanet.info/forum/
"Autism a apart of my neurology complexities... and for some reason
dare I say the word autism the reactions unbelievable sometimes, its
not what people know, its what they do not know, ignorance can stop
some people from even saying the word, I am not a word but a person
and everyone is different, maybe we all need to discuss and say more!"
.
Enough talk time for action, how many more individuals need to feel like
lost souls, alienated from a society that often simply does not understand,
accept or allow. Everyone has a right to an education, to be employed and live
a life on equal terms! I feel it’s not so much about closing the gap, but changing
attitudes, as many of us on the autism spectrum already compromised enough!
.
Can add COMMENTS to ALL web page screens, scroll down!
"What has happen, has happen and we can not turn back time,
but we do not have to continue to allow others to tell us how we
should be, no one is going to think for me anymore, don't let my
smile fool you, I have no choice but to be a rebel in disguise!"
.
.
Aspergers there still is generally a lack of understanding and not enough support but to me raising awareness is so important, because to not know, is to stay lost, and not really be able to know or understand your true self. Can we ever be 100% sure that any label is correct, but we need to understand who we are. Many of us misunderstood, confused, wrongly diagnosed, it's not an easy path. Aspergers has only been a part of the diagnostic criteria since 1994. But it's better to know, than never have known...
.
People with Aspergers Syndrome include remarkable individuals in all walks of life. They include scientists, engineers, technicians, writers, artists, musicians, business people including CEO’s, entertainers and almost ordinary people, as well as people with serious difficulties who can't seem to hold jobs and don't make eye contact. This is a large, and largely invisible, population not limited to stereotypical geeks and nerds. All share many challenges and most have issues with getting along or being fully accepted in society.
.
Education and awareness really is the key to a better society where we can help eliminate, as much as possible the prejudgment and stigma before it happens. Quite often the real problem with having something like Aspergers is having to continually deal with others who do not understand, which can lead to feeling frustrated, as the so called "normal world" often see us as outsiders and keep us at arm’s length. Aspergers is just the way I'm wired; we are all different and have different symptoms Aspies, Auties and NT's etc.. the world is made up of many diversities, but we need to at least be able to understand who we are.
. With a condition like Asperger it is exceptionally hard because no 2 people are the same. We may have some of the same traits, but we are all individuals in our selves, different personalities, different circumstances, different associated conditions and each effected differently. So generalizing about people with Aspergers is difficult, as if you know one person on the autism spectrum, you just know one! We are unique individuals and share traits which have been behind some of the greatest human achievements to date.
.
.
"However much we are knocked back in life, we must always move
forward, stay strong and smile, as each of us has our own life journey's
to fulfil, the key for me is to stick with like minded individuals, reach out
because their is always someone in more need and to remmeber those
that may seem like outsiders, often simply being true to themselves!"
.
.
Our 'symptoms' are in fact ourselves, not some unfortunate illness we suffer. We are unique individuals which the so-called 'normal' world underestimate and even despise, but often do not try to understand. We have been made to believe in a stereotype of 'normality' for our children, and to panic, fear and react when our offspring don't achieve. As far too often it’s the associated conditions we need help with, but the NT's continue to blame our Autism Spectrum Disorders for everything!
.
Every person is different, whether you have Aspergers/High Functioning Autism, Autism, Dyslexia, or whatever you’re still human – what is the norm, do you or anyone else have the right to dictate. Someone once said to me "if you had a chance of being normal, would you" and I replied "is there a normal, aren't we all individuals in our own right, and to me thats like asking me to be someone else - so no I think I will keep me"..
.
Autism without mental retardation Disorders/intellectual disability are said to be the same thing by many experts. I tend to agree and feel it's all the same spectrum, just different levels of ability at different things. I feel all aspies have similar traits just at different levels - I'm all for one Full Official Criteria, instead of two, maybe it would be easier for the professionals then to get it right. Also I feel at times aspergers does not get taken as seriously as autism , and it should as can still have huge consequenties.
.
"Asperger’s Syndrome, but I cannot be exact as the lines of definition are so closely intertwined between this term and others. The reason is that there are many autistic disorders, referred to as the Autism Spectrum and they are often diagnosed on the basis of behaviour. Unfortunately, there are no specific genetic or biological markers that accurately identify a person as being on this autism spectrum. People on the spectrum do have certain traits in common such as impairment in social interaction, impairment in communication, and restricted and/or repetitive patterns of behaviour, interests and activities. Autism in all forms tends to first manifest itself in childhood even before the age three and the differences within the autism spectrum are related to both severity and the presence or absence of some symptoms. - MS Carsley"
.
.
Eccentricity is not, as dull people would have us believe, a form of
madness. It is often a kind of innocent pride, and the man of genius
and the aristocrat are frequently regarded as eccentrics because
genius and aristocrat are entirely unafraid of and uninfluenced
by the opinions and vagaries of the crowd. - Edith Sitwell
.
.
Finding and understanding self is a process: It is a journey, the first step to acceptance and recognition that in fact most of our lives have been an act in away, a pretense and of course we have learned to change adapt, but at who's cost... time for the mask to come off and allow, celebrate the real you. Many of us start on a journey, finding we have already spent half our lives trying to be what we are not - neuro typical "norm" and then we get to spend the next half trying to figure out who we are Aspies / Auties.....fair, NO
.
A dear friend I meet on my new journey sent me the quote below, after returning from the NZ Autism Conference September 2008 and feeling as if no one gets it, except my fellow aspies, and those living with aspies daily. Who I can only continually thank for being so supportive worldwide, it’s like I have gained a whole new extra large extended family. I feel that partly maybe we are just genetically different, and others are unable to tolerate our quirky traits!
.
This web site shares my journey and others...I want this site to be as much yours as mine.... site added to and updated regularly, daily on forum. You can add comments to all web site screens, at bottom of each web page, or just come and chat or help others on the forum. I would love to add your story, thoughts.
.
Wrong diagnosis: In the past many people have been misdiagnosed with various conditions. Some people on the autism spectrum do have associated conditions and some do not. But one of the biggest problems is the misconception that people on the spectrum always have some sort of mental disorder, which is not the case. Children on the spectrum can be very bright and parents often think there oddities are due to them being gifted.
.
But generally the most common mis-diagnoses are: Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD), Oppositional Defiant Disorder (OD), Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD), and Mood Disorders such as Cyclothymic Disorder, Dysthymic Disorder, Depression, Bi-Polar Disorder and Schizophrenia. These common mis-diagnoses stem from an ignorance among many professionals about specific social and emotional characteristics of people on the spectrum.
.
Just one example of many: "Something wasn't adding up" about my daughters behavior for her parents when she was 2 years old, her mother said. In fourth grade, she was diagnosed correctly. Before that, doctors thought she had cerebral palsy, a seizure disorder, then attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder and oppositional defiant disorder.......
.
"I also love patterns, numbers even sadly the rubic cube. But
creatively I feel this is partly why we see more into things than
others, we notice patterns, numbers etc.. and can make order to
them differently from the average person. I have also heard that
many aspie type people were used to decode things in the war
like the Enigma code these days they are called hackers!."
.
.
Labels! Just want to make one thing very clear. I do not want to put any labels on anyone, and you could say Aspergers is a label. But it describes a neurological wiring which is an intrinsic characteristic of ours, unfortunately still a very misunderstood one. Asperser’s, just like neurotypicism, is neither good nor bad, but simply a label that applies to a particular type of brain functioning.
.
Aspergers and a lot of the associated conditions / symptoms are related to brain chemicals, high or low, so maybe we should all avoid specific labels, where possible, and just treat the condition/symptoms!. But we do need to raise awareness, because otherwise people like me will stay undiagnosed and suffer unnecessary as I have in the past.
.
My own mother was never diagnosed with Aspergers unlike me, I'm lucky at least now I know and understand who I am, but my mother was wrongly diagnosed with metal disorders and had quite a few electroconvulsive treatments over the years, so had to deal with her many suicide attempts and having an unavailable mother who always felt like she never belonged and consequent of this, like so many others she was never happy in this world. I continue to hear so many similar stories, of wrong diagnosis and feeling of alienation.
.
Unfortunately without raising awareness of Aspergers, it will never become just another fact, like being left or right handed. If people do not know of or understand, how can we help those in need? By understanding better, eventually less people will be left in the dark, confused and misunderstood. Only by discussing and bringing the unknown into the open, can it become norm. To me just like being color blind, it’s just a different way of thinking and seeing things. That’s why it’s vital we all listen to each other and unite on this.
.
.
I do not have a lifelong disability Aspergers is part of who I am, I’m ok
with that, why cannot you be! Raising Awareness of Aspergers Syndrome:
http://asplanet.info/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=32&Itemid=67
.
.
Sometimes it can seem like an endless tasks to convince people that you or your children may be on the Autism Spectrum Disorder and then where on the spectrum another huge task. I myself have felt at times, it’s like trying to achieve the impossible just to get diagnosed, let alone know what to do and where to go. There is help out there, so do not give up - And remember more than often you’re the best judge of yourself and / or children, as far too few really good professionals and of course if I can help in any way, I will just ask.
.
I feel one of the problems still lies with big organizations, over structure, fighting for funding…instead of dealing with the real problems and working with the people who can really help. We truly need to all come together, otherwise people on the spectrum are left to try and fit the puzzle together themselves. I also feel with so many different individuals working on different aspects of the spectrum, it is quite disjointed and hard for an out sided to get an overall view of the whole picture.
.
When Dr. Temple Grandin was a child, she was labeled autistic (low-functioning) and her parents were told she should be institutionalized. Some people argue that no child should be given a label like low-functioning. Autistics themselves are beginning to speak out against the low functioning labels they received as children, and the abuse they suffered in institutions. Abuse of the disabled, or those labeled disabled, is unfortunately an all too common problem..
.
Arguably the most famous living individual with autism, Temple Grandin boasts a highly successful career in the cattle industry and a prodigious collection of autobiographical works. Almost certainly the most public figure with autism, Ms. Grandin also has decades of practice communicating with people about what it's like to live as an autistic individual in the "neurotypical" world.
.
If you've heard Grandin speak before, you might be surprised to hear her voice in this interview -- her typical monotonic "robot" voice has softened a bit over the years, as I'm sure she's aware. She's grown expert in expressing her experience in a way that people without autism will understand, in part because over the course of a lifetime she's put a lot of effort into understanding how her way of being in the world diverges from the "neurotypical.".
.
Hopefully as awareness grows, this site will reach
out like the brances of a large old wise oak tree !
.
.
Knowing is the first step to really understanding yourself
The first steps are never easy, it’s not that simply as from day one we are all born as unique individuals, and we are all altered and changed by life experiences and our environmental situations. But a circle does not fit into a square, and if you have always felt the outside, just different – maybe there is a lot more to you than even you realized, just maybe you have been gifted with AS (Aspergers Syndrome, Advanced Species, Alien Species….any other suggestions!)
.
There are so many more AS diagnosed and undiagnosed individuals out there, in fact I have heard recently, it is estimated that as many as every 1 in 100 people has an Autism Spectrum Disorder, this includes people who have Aspergers. I’m not saying any of you need to advertise the fact if you have AS, or even be diagnosed. But you really do need to know, to understand. I want to make people aware AS is not an illness. Usually the AS people are quite talented, creative, innovative – but often so miss understood. We are not all the same, so professionals out there remember we all individuals just like everyone else, so when giving advice or diagnosing us it would help for you to remember that!
. Writing is not my best subject, due to being dyslexic and more... but I have so much to say, and even if it does take me 10 xs longer than anyone else (bare with me) – if only you knew the amount of times I recheck para’s and still get bits wrong, so frustrating. It’s like my mind is 100 xs faster, than I could ever write or type and its auto for me to muddle words around the wrong way, so I read and re read – until correct! Still I’m working on that one. And for all you aspies who are obsessive about things being 100% please bare with me.
.
I want to let you into my personal journey in the hope that I can inspire and help others. I was diagnosed with Aspergers in July 07 and told have bipolar traits which I seem to have under control now!, but maybe that does explain my obsessive compulsive tendencies and anxiety, moods etc... and there is more, just before that May.07 diagnosed with Dyslexia & Dyspraxia. Undiagnosed: I'm sure I also haveADHD when younger and still do (still very hyper). and have clutters a speech disorder, when younger speech was corrected, and then have/had lots of sight problems(visual perception difficulties), possibally face blindness! and do have Dermatotillomania (skin picking).
.
Still we are who we are and what I do now realize all these symptoms are just a part of who I am, just happy to know the reasons for my differences, even if the neuro typical do not always seem to understand. Was it all a shock, yes a huge one especially at my age, but I tend to deal with things head on hence this site. Would love a full correct diagnosis one day, but cost... so if anyone is willing, I would love to have all the test and really know for sure!
.
After years of fighting the unknown "Aspergers" and my other differences..., I feel I have been acting a part in this world, it was like my life was on hold until now. I have no energy to want to please everyone else anymore, I just want to be able to take off the mask, stop playing the part and at last be myself. At times it can be very lonely, as others continue to unintentionally alienate me. .
I have had to live with bullying as a never ending continuum throughout life that turned to discrimination, but that has not stopped me wanting to help you all fight the course and change things. As I know by opening up to the world, as you and other's start your journey, I will be here and I truly do understand. Hopefully, as awareness grows, this site will reach more of you....
.
.
"To be nobody but yourself in a world that is doing its best to make you every
-one else is to fight the hardest battle that anyone can fight" ee cummings
______________________________
.
.
Thanks for your ongoing support
First I wanted to know for me
Then I wanted to know for you
Now I want the world to agree
How special & great AS can be
.
.
I can now look back and smile, but it still amazes me, how
I never knew, how everything seemed complicated, how I
continually got so much wrong - until I really understood!
.
.
Never let your sense of morals get in the
way of doing what's right. - Isaac Asimov
.
.
You can help make a difference - help raise awareness
http://asplanet.info/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=67&Itemid=111
.
.
As I progress on my own journey, many of my existing articles,
Web Pages have been updated, added to, even changed as I learn
and understand more myself. So remember to check back from
time to time, new insights added regularly. Also like any good
movie, often it can take a few times to realize somethings!.
.
.
.
General Web Site comments : See below and add yours -
scroll down and click on "write comments" at bottom of screen
| User Comments |
| Comment by Guest on 2009-04-02 03:26:11
Alyson,Dian Fossey Gorilla Fund sent you a compliment: You make the world a better place,
on behalf of the gorillas, thanks for your support! Brianne | |
Comment by Guest on 2009-02-24 22:11:02
AsPlanet, your website is wonderful. I have some more material to obsess on.. Aspies rock! | |
Comment by GUEST on 2009-03-19 00:19:00
Thank you Karinna rosales . | Comment by Guest on 2009-01-10 18:37:33
You make the world a better place....
I see your dream of undoing the harm of the past. The first step is to see the autistic person as normal. We all have to start at this step. I think you will show us the way to feel normal just as you have with your family. I think it is important (although people are still learning) that you have been there, done that, survived and look how life is for you now. You will make the world a better place. The world needs your message. http://autism.change.org/blog/view/once_upon_a_time_i_tried_to_recover_my_son_from_autism You wrote, "the aspie/auite community have embraced me as one of there own and for the first time in my life I truly feel like I belong some where" and tears came to my eyes. I have never been allow to say to our parents or the people in our city(this is a great city to live) what a great son I have. People bring up the past but can't stand to hear anything about the present. He lives in a big city and has plenty of friends.Jjust wanting to say that I am very proud of him. "Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful man". It's really the first opportunity I have ever had. It's just something I need to do to feel like a whole person. I know you guys will be supportive this one time.
I was inspired by Alyson Bradley's RAISE AWARENESS WORLD WIDE. We do need to show the world that there is no boundaries for our kids. We need to make the world see what we see about our kids in our families. They are great!! In the dark ages(1980's & 1990's) Autism was seen as a death sentence for parents when I raised my son. How would you describe autism now? So many kids are improving by different parenting styles(cure, no cure etc.) we have to let the world know what we already know.
I wanted to comment on the term "lifelong disability". Having raised two generations (my brother and my son) this is how I feel about lifelong disability. I was taught by my brother. Both of them have their own definitions about who they are. My brother is smart and my son fits into the world and has the gifts of autism. They think of themselves as normal.
When they first entered school and to first get services it was necessary to be labelled as disabled. The label, "lifelong disabillity" is just emotional baggage they don't need. If you believe something to be true, you act accordingly. They believe they fit in the world and feel normal. They have become their own person with a "mix salad, mix bag" of strenghts and weaknesses just like the rest of us. Lifelong disability implies defective, something different from the rest. My brother made me understand this. I was believing when he lived with me as an adult that he was defective and this made him feel defective. These words were destroying him. Except for our childhood journey in both of their pasts, to me they are just like me. This helps raise the expectations that other people will have of them. At the part time alternative school he attended the most important concept was to raise the bar, not lower the bar of behavior and achievement. Just like in college my son was going around trying to explain himself and autism to others who noticed he was different. It is so great that he doesn't pay attention to these people because he knows inside that he fits in and therefore is like everyone else. Why should our kids live their lives explaining themselves to people who will never understand. A Simple life is the best.
My brother gets DVR(Dept. of Vocational Rehab) and Social Security (SSI) which qualifies him for medicare. He owed $75,000 before getting the medicare card. Now no one is responsible for his health care. My son refuses services which is fine with me.
It all goes back to the social worker telling me that I must treat my son like a regular kid. Our whole family and our son reacted by feeling they had more normal lives. By being normal the entire family can forget things that happened in the past. We can live in the present.
Just like Kristina Chew said, "my own growing up different has been something I've drawn upon", my brother's words helped me to raise my son in a healthy way. My son is a great person who happens to have autism. The emphasis is on person.
Comment by GUEST on 2007-12-02 21:38:07
Firstly congratulations on your site, it is informative and personal and gives a very postive, celebratory first hand overview of Aspergers, dyslexia and dyspraxia. I am sure it will be a great resource to many people around the world. Your philosophy regarding labels and acceptance and understanding is congruent with our own . |
|
Comment by GUEST on 2007-08-06 07:20:55
Many thanks for your response, I saw the article in 'The Press' it is certainly just what is needed to increase awareness and hopefully reduce the misconceptions that are out in the community. I like your point in your website that everyone whether on the autistic spectrum or not is different. I think a lot of professionals working with people with ASD forget this fact. Again many thanks |
|
Comment by GUEST on 2007-08-07 02:09:26
thanks for your wonderful insight to Aspergers,dyslexia and dyspraxia.It would be great if I and others who have a family member with this difference, be helped to better understand and support them,and us.Thankyou again, Alyson. |
|
Comment by GUEST on 2007-08-22 04:06:24
Great job, ever time I look at site something new has been added, very interesting, lots of great links and enjoying the forum. Thanks again |
|
Comment by GUEST on 2007-07-26 23:18:32
I just had a look at the website, it looks fantastic and good on you for doing it. |
|
Comment by GUEST on 2007-12-05 18:39:54
your website is a delight to visit on the other hand, i have only found the time to do so once and didn't have time to write anything, have to be in
another completely different head space. |
|
Comment by GUEST on 2007-07-26 23:32:06
EVERYTHING happens for a reason… sometimes it’s hard to see it at the time but, eventually there is always a lesson to be learned. And, I also believe that one never meets anyone else “by accident.” I know that many people will be better understood because of your efforts!
You warm and touch my hear, here’s to a wonderful outreach my dear friend. |
|
Comment by GUEST on 2007-07-29 00:11:05
Thank so, so much for a great site, there really is an need for non professional interactive sites, especially here in NZ. Cheers |
|
Comment by GUEST on 2007-07-31 06:18:32
I praise your good work, I work with people with aspergers/autism, and the more info available the better. I checked out your site, and it's good. Thanks |
|
Comment by GUEST on 2007-07-31 06:20:21
It's soo important to hear from people with it, and their view of it all, to be able to help them!! . very reassuring
Comment by Guest on 2009-01-06 15:33:16
What a great inspiration site, I find in general the professionals and government funded sites still wanting to help change rather than embrace mode, they need more people like you working with them or even better instead of!. Too many none asd people are trying to tell asd people what to do and in the process getting it so wrong, half of them just do not get it themselves... so thank you as you really have made a difference to me and my child, helped us feel proud and confident in who we are.
Reply:
Thank you for your kind words, each of us has a story to tell and each a different story. I tend to agree with you that more asd people should be working with official sites, that is beginning to change and feel people like Tony Attwood to some extent has started to bridge that gap, a professional not on the spectrum who understands, well alot more than most as I do not agree with everything even he says! but as he has said his best advice has come from those of us on the autism spectrum, maybe others should listen to his words.. after all its other people lives that are being played with.
The 2 professionals I feel have it right and who I take my inspiration from at times are Donna Williams and Stephen Shore, both aspies/auties says it all really...
|
|
Comment by GUEST on 2007-07-31 06:23:40
I think your site is great and it is helpful to hear your thoughts as someone who has been diagnosed later in life. |
|
Comment by GUEST on 2007-07-31 06:29:25
Alyson you give me hope for my son. Three cheers for you starting your web page I'm sure a lot of parents will find it very helpful. |
|
Comment by Guest on 2007-10-12 18:24:54
thanks - from the bottom of my heart - for creating the site and telling your story.
thank you for sending along your site. I have a daughter with Asperger's and it is indeed an interesting "condition". Congrats on getting your site up and running...and I agree, awareness is key to understanding. Way to go! |
|
Comment by Guest on 2007-12-05 18:42:49
Think Differently - Thank you Alyson, the link looks great. Support like this is so important in raising awareness, and we really appreciate it.
Best wishes,Sarah (NAS)
This message is from The National Autistic Society
Dear Alyson
Thank you for supporting our think differently about autism campaign. Together we will improve the lives of the 1 in 100 people in the UK with autism by creating a better understanding of autism in society. Thanks again for your ongoing support Benet Middleton Director of Communications
.
Hi Alyson, Thanks for your really nice comment on my blog, I'm going to read your website, and I love the way you are approaching Asperger's there, and focussing on raising awareness.
I feel there is so much to be done, researched, discussed and explained on this subject, and the "disorder" model shuts down a lot of that. I also wonder how many Asperger's people (especially ones who actually manage to do well in life) are not involved in raising awareness because they don't want or need the label. People in a lot of trouble are more likely to be desperately seeking help, especially parents finding it hard to cope. But their view of things is not going to be as balanced as if there were a lot more articulate successful Asperger's people with excellent social skills (of course we can learn those!) speaking up and spreading the word.
I'm just saying this because it's in my head right now, as I'm thinking about being more active in terms of consciousness-raising.
Lovely to meet you! Alice Bachini-Smith |
|
Comment by guest on 2007-12-11 20:22:47
Well the email from Lee at CCS with your website has to be about the best Christmas Present I could dream of. Thank you for creating such an informative website. I am however feeling comforted in the fact that your descriptions do fit with AS and that we may in fact only be dealing with 1 thing not a huge array of unknowns.
I just reviewed your website and found it to be a great resource for people on the Autism/Asperger’s spectrum. While we don’t have a way to promote your website directly, we will keep it in our resource data base for people on the spectrum.
You’ve done a very nice job with your site. For those of us with children on the spectrum and not autistic ourselves, it is good to read your words so that we have a better understanding of what it must be like for our children.Autism Speaks. |
|
Comment by GUEST on 2008-01-29 23:14:13
You know you are a very pretty and cheerful looking woman, I must say. Alyson, don't ever look back. I don't anymore. I look ahead of me now. I really do love my page, and it's nice to see what I had accomplished since my Mom passed away back in May of 2000....
Your long distant, and true friend Joey:)
Joey - I will always be great full for you letting me add your inspirational story to my web site, I do always look forward, as far too many dark shadows in the past..hopefully the future will be brighter for both of us. Take care Aly |
|
Comment by GUEST on 2007-12-05 18:38:04
Thank you so much for establishing this website. It is so informative. I have read many books on Aspergers written by NT people, but they don't compare to reading the words of a real live person who has Aspergers syndrome.
Thank you, thank you,thank you.
" This is a wonderful website! It had the best description of Asperger symptoms, with complete explanations, that I have read ANYWHERE!!
Just excellent! "
" Yea is a good website. Its good because its all about what I want to talk about lol atm ASPERGERS. so mm.. GO check it out!!
and the forum is really helpful " |
|
Comment by Guest on 2007-09-22 07:23:36
Hi Alz. Thanks for starting up your web site. It's fantastic! I found the part concerning the passing of your mother incredibly moving, as I lost my mother about this time last year. All the best! |
|
|
